| A Man's World? - Part 1 |
I set out to write this article on what it is like to be a female webmaster in this male dominated industry with my first objective being to collect some opinions from the various females that have the pleasure (or maybe not) of working in online porn. I set out on my quest by first visiting one of the largest Webmaster boards in the biz and subsequently posting a thread looking for stories or opinions from female webmasters. Well, within the first five minutes of posting, my thread was berated by a swarm of male webmasters who jumped all over me for posting a thread that was (and I quote directly), “dribble”, “aimless”, and “most obviously posted by a feel-good guy”. It was a perfect example of how sometimes it is rather difficult to be a female Webmaster in an industry that is definitely comprised of mostly males. Little did they know that besides insulting me, they were also helping me put this article together. Here is what one of the narrow-minded males had to say about women in response to my post:
“The fact is anyone who will be honest will tell you that many (not all) are a bitch to deal with in anything. Sell something to a women you will never hear the end of it. Get a woman to do work for you and it will almost always be late because its that time of month or something. Put a bit to much pressure and its sexual harassment”
Aside from the beating that I took from some of the male members of the board, I did also receive a tremendous outpouring of responses from some of the female members. I gathered some terrific insight into the pros and cons of being a female Webmaster as well as some of the prejudices these women have experienced and I also was privy to some very interesting tales. Women in this industry have very different opinions of how they are viewed by the male webmasters as well as whether being a woman have a direct correlation to their status in the business.
Here is what Tam of PIBCash had to say,
About being a female Webmaster in a male dominated industry:
”I think being a woman in this industry is exactly what you make of it. The same goes if you are a man. You either gain respect or you dont. SOME women have to work harder than others, I agree. BUT, if a woman, no one in particular, shows that she can work along side a man, then she should get the respect that she deserves. If women come in and have an attitude that says, "respect me and help me BECAUSE I am a woman", then she is doing two things and both are equally futile. She is setting herself up to look shallow and helpless and she is setting herself up where people will not only NOT respect her, but a lot of times she will not get any help because she is showing signs of wanting everything done for her. She HAS to be willing to work as hard as a man in this, or any, business and if she is willing to do this then she will eventually gain the respect she deserves. If not, then she is doomed from the start and will not be taken seriously.
I know this sounds harsh, but I also know that being a woman of 38 years of age, I have learned a few things in working along side of men all my life. I have always worked in male dominated businesses and always will, for the plain and simple fact that I dont mind working and I dont mind getting my hands "dirty". The last thing I ever want is to be given benefits on the basis that I am a female with tits and ass. I also came equipped with a brain and I know how to use it and want to be given the opportunity to do just that.
I would like to say that I have met some AMAZING women... and men... in this business, and there isnt anything I would do to trade even one of them for anything. There are whiners on both sides of the fence, but those are the people that you stay away from, as they are not going to respect you no matter WHAT you do. Just do your thing and you WILL gain the respect you deserve whether you are male OR female. In my current job with PIBCash.com, my boss treats me as his equal, not like he is my superior and Id like to think I have earned that respect.”
About the prejudices that she has experienced:
”I have run into this a couple of times, but not often at all. I have seen some other women in the industry run into it. I did have one guy tell me once that because I was a woman I would get whatever I wanted, which was and is so not the case. I have had to work my butt off to prove that I am a solid Webmaster, and not because I was a woman, but because I was new. Once everyone knew I was here to stay and I was about as serious as they get, I began to gain more respect in the adult industry. Yes, I play hard, but I also work hard and I think that speaks for itself.”
About something funny that came as a result of her Nickname:
”I had been in the Adult Industry for about 18 months when a very good friend I had talked to for some time approached me and freaked because he found out I was a woman, which caused insane laughter from me. I had never told anyone I was a woman, and never said that I was a man, some just assumed because I was in porn, I was a man. Also, I found out later that Tam is an Asian male’s name, which I didnt know, so that obviously didnt help people see that I was a woman. I literally had to show my ass to prove that I was a female.”
Now, while Tam believes that being a woman has not really hindered her success due to the fact that she works her ass off, other women feel the gender prejudices a little closer to home. Lilbitch of Sarcastic-Bastards had the following to say about the prejudices that she has experienced in the industry, “being treated as if we have no mind whatsoever is the biggest prejudice of all. Most will never look above our chest and realize that we DO have a brain. Its as if by having a set of tits, this means that we know nothing other than inserting bizarre objects into ourselves for the cam...”
While collecting data and gathering responses, I also came across one aspect of being a female Webmaster that I had never considered before. It seems that some male webmasters are actually shy or embarrassed to talk about porn, etc. with a female. Cheshire of Adult.com made the following revelation, “A lot of the time when a male member calls the office, they hesitate telling me what site theyre calling about. I have to say that its okay to tell me, and then they do. I think that its cute.” One of the male posters responded to this with a related story of his own, “I called CCbill support a while back and a woman who sounded like my grandmother answered and asked me which site I was calling about. I was like ummmmmm virginassfucking.com...mam. LOL”. So, maybe ladies when a male webmaster starts acting funny towards you, do not take it the wrong way, it could be that they are just shy about discussing the “dirty details” with you.
I received such an overwhelming response to this topic that I have decided to make it a series. Stay tuned for Part 2 of this feature coming up in the next few weeks. It will be packed full of opinions from both women AND men about the status of females in this industry. |
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| Article Details |
| Author: Muffy |
| Date Posted: April 4th, 2004 |
| Topic: Adult Industry News |
| Reader Rating: 0.0 / 5 |
| Comments Posted: 0 (see below) |
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